BEYOND SPACE: Hurricane

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Wednesday of Fail - 2011/11/09

Ah yes, it is finally time to go back to normality, and what says normality better than an institution. A tradition even. Welcome to the next installment of the Wednesdays of Fail! This week is kind of special because for the first time, at least that I've heard of, the person who submitted the Fail Mail made it clear to me that he wish to remain anonymous because the player who lost the ship in this particular piece of hilarity is a member of his own alliance, and apparently also a repeat offender... and after clicking the link I hope and pray that Max1mus Dec1mus will not remain an alliance-mate due to his desecration of one of my favorite ships:

[Hurricane, Max1mus Dec1mus's Cane]
200mm Reinforced Steel Plates II
100mm Reinforced Crystalline Carbonide Plates I
400mm Reinforced Rolled Tungsten Plates I
200mm Reinforced Steel Plates II
Gyrostabilizer I
Gyrostabilizer I

Y-T8 Overcharged Hydrocarbon I Microwarpdrive
Invulnerability Field II
[empty med slot]
[empty med slot]

650mm Artillery Cannon I, EMP M
650mm Artillery Cannon I, EMP M
150mm Railgun I, Antimatter Charge S
150mm Railgun I, Antimatter Charge S
150mm Railgun I, Antimatter Charge S
'Malkuth' Heavy Assault Missile Launcher I, Torrent Assault Missile
'Malkuth' Heavy Assault Missile Launcher I, Torrent Assault Missile
'Malkuth' Heavy Assault Missile Launcher I, Torrent Assault Missile

Hammerhead I x2
Hobgoblin I x2

http://imperiallegion.eve-kill.net/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=10828309

Damnit! It's been a few weeks since this abheration has seared my eyes and now to post this I had to not only click the killboard link again, but I also had to fit the thing in EFT. I need a new appointment with my ophtalmologist now. Fuck! Alright, let's try to be objective about this: here we have someone who clearly has an addiction to armor buffer tanks. In case you didn't know and in the interest of n00blet education, this is not how to do it. Next, a Y-T8 microwarpdrive is fine on a Cane, but a shield hardener on top of the "armor" tank? Huh... no. And the high slots... I've had this Fail Mail for over 3 weeks now and I still don't get what MaxDec was going for. Care to explain bro? Hey this gives me an idea: if anyone sees his/her own killmail posted here and has the balls to go public as to why one would fit a ship like they did, I will match the ISK prize that the submitter got! The more funny stuff, the better :))

Mr Anonymous Fail Mail Sender, for putting your own alliance-mate on the Pedestal of Fail, you will be receiving 200,050 ISK which is the value of one of the 200mm T2 plates; I mean face it, how often do you see anyone fit a T2 plate ?!

Do you have a funny killmail you would like to share with the community? If so, please evemail the killboard or BattleClinic link to Cozmik R5 in-game, or send it via regular e-mail at r3dfiv3@hotmail.com

Just as WDA and Ga'len have done in the past, the sender of a killmail that has been posted on the blog will receive a small ISK prize, the value of a random module fitted on the ship; dream on if you think I'll pay for Faction, Complex or Officer mods!

Keep your eyes open for Fail, and rid New Eden of these atrocities!

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Wednesdays of Fail - 2011/10/19

At last, here I am, home with a modern (OK, slightly old) computer with an up to date browser, and without the KGB and the Gestapo blocking my every attempt to go on a website about gaming, even if they fail at keeping me from Facebook. Yeah, City of Montreal administration and Technology mix just about as well as EVE and Kids! And yes it's that time of the week, the Wednesday of Fail! This week's entry is quite a looker, coming from Randunip of Steel Talon Initiative corp. I don't know how people cane fail-fit the Hurricane so much, it's such a perfect ship when fit right... anyway, make sure you put down that sandwich you're eating and that you've gulped down that swig of beer before looking at this thing because I don't want to be held responsible for any deaths by suffocation; at least make sure someone is nearby ready to apply the Heimlich Maneuver. Ready? Here goes:

[Hurricane, Krammski's Hurricane]
Muon Coil Bolt Array I
Warp Core Stabilizer I
Cross-Lateral Gyrostabilizer I
Expanded Cargohold II
Small Armor Repairer I
Overdrive Injector System I

Medium Shield Booster II
Warp Scrambler I
10MN MicroWarpdrive I
'Langour' Drive Disruptor I

250mm Light Artillery Cannon I, EMP S
250mm Light Artillery Cannon I, EMP S
'Malkuth' Standard Missile Launcher I, Sabretooth Light Missile
'Malkuth' Standard Missile Launcher I, Sabretooth Light Missile
Salvager I
250mm Light Artillery Cannon I, EMP S
280mm Howitzer Artillery I, EMP S
'Malkuth' Standard Missile Launcher I, Sabretooth Light Missile

Hammerhead I x3

http://eve.battleclinic.com/killboard/killmail.php?id=12290722

Told you it would hurt. This thing fails on so many levels I barely know where to start! Let's begin with the location of this kill... ah, W-space! I kind of miss it sometimes, but I digress. Now what is usually commonplace on a ship flying in W-space? A probe launcher of course... but it's kinda hard to use it when it's in the CARGO HOLD! This probe launcher was obviously meant for another, but still. Moving on... Jiminy H. Cricket just look at this entire fit !!! Armor-rep/shield-boost-stabbed-light-weps with not enough drones to hurt a NPC cruiser and he had to put a web and scram on this ?!?! Can somebody pass me the X-acto so I can gouge out my eyes plz? Seriously, I have no clue what this guy was trying or why he was even flying what should be such a nice ship but instead was fitted with..... THIS! Oh well, such is EVE :))

Randunip, you sir need to be rewarded for ridding the New Eden cluster of... whatever you call this. Because they were one of the rare things that could've been useful in W-space, you will receive 350,000 ISK for the Combat Scan Probes which were located in the cargo hold.

Keep your eyes open for Fail, and rid New Eden of these atrocities!