Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Wednesdays of Fail - 2011/10/12

Ah yes! I am now back home and no longer have to deal with a stupid Nazi firewall and an even stupider IE7 browser (yes... IE7 FFS !!!) so I can finally post the thing that everybody loves to laugh at and/or feel physical pain from. That's right, it's Fail Mail time! This week's entry is kind of special because I received an evemail not too long after I posted a certain Chimera dying horribly to a frigate gang. Well guess what... apparently I had only one side of the story, which is fair. But the evemail contained a bit more than the "yeah, harrdy harr harr I got caught pants down, etc" for the sender was none other than the pilot of the Chimera. And Lo and Behold, he had a sweet sweet link of revenge to show me:

[Blackbird, Jharn Ru's Blackbird]
Signal Amplifier II
Power Diagnostic System I

Large C5-L Emergency Shield Overload I
Large F-S9 Regolith Shield Induction
ECM - Multispectral Jammer II
Medium Capacitor Booster I, Cap Booster 25
10MN Afterburner II
Invulnerability Field II

'Arbalest' Standard Missile Launcher, Sabretooth Light Missile
Prototype Cloaking Device I
Medium 'Vehemence' I Shockwave Charge
[empty high slot]

Medium Core Defence Field Extender I
Medium Anti-EM Screen Reinforcer I
Medium Particle Dispersion Augmentor I

Excuse my bad french but TA-BAR-NAK !!! What we have here is a prototype Caldari Navy ship tentatively called the Cloaky-Shield/Cap-Boosting-WTFBB. If you can think of a better name for this abomination please inform me. Let's see... let's do it from rigs on up. Usually a Blackbird-type ship (which are the Blackbird, Falcon and Rook if you didn't know) is used for one thing and one thing only: jamming. So obviously the rigs of choice would be a set of those particle thingamabobs, not a mix of jam and tank. Moving up to the low slots: fairly standard here. A signal amp, a PDS... but don't BB pilots usually plate up that thing? Moving on up... yeah, my eyes hurt too! Usually a Blackbird-type ship fits pretty much NOTHING BUT JAMMERS, unless your name is Unzer or Loofaro who are, and I've mentioned this before, Falcon artists. So this mix of active and passive tank, jams and afterburner will get you precisely nowhere fast. And finally the high slots... the only useful thing here is the cloak frankly. The smart bomb can maybe dent some light drones (T1 and badly skilled), and the overpriced frigate-sized missile launcher is frigate sized. Even with the benefit of All Level V skills, this ship's DPS is a hair above a quarter of a standard Rifter fit. I sincerely hope that this fit is not a standard Quantum Horizon fit because I just may have to ask for an ISK prize refund XD j/k.

So WarheadRex, consider your Chimera avenged! When I posted your carrier I awarded the killmail sender ISK for the cloaking device that could've saved you. Guess what... you'll be able to buy a new cloaking device because you will be receiving 1,499,990 ISK!

Do you have a funny killmail you would like to share with the community? If so, please evemail the killboard or BattleClinic link to Cozmik R5 in-game, or send it via regular e-mail at

Just as WDA and Ga'len have done in the past, the sender of a killmail that has been posted on the blog will receive a small ISK prize, the value of a random module fitted on the ship; dream on if you think I'll pay for Faction, Complex or Officer mods!

Keep your eyes open for Fail, and rid New Eden of these atrocities!



Riley (Ga'len) said..., that guy should head back to WoW.


Benoit CozmikR5 Gauthier said...

Even in WoW I fear that this guy would fail at equipping his elf, paladin, sorcerer, or whatever people use in that game!